Misis : Darling, ano ang tawag sa isang asawa na sexy, maganda, hindi selosa, mapagmahal, masipag, mapagkalinga, masarap magluto?
Mister: Guni-guni!
***
TANONG: Paano mo sasabihin sa isang babae na mataba siya nang hindi siya mababastos?
SAGOT: ’Uhm, excuse me, miss…Mang Tomas ba ang lotion mo?’
***
Aanhin ko ang napakalaking bahay, mamahaling sasakyan, milyun-milyong kayamanan, at masasarap na pagkain kung ang kapit-bahay ko ang [...]
What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
Juan on Juan
***
What is a Yankee?
The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.
***
What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover ?
The position of the dirt bag
***
Why is divorce so expensive?
Because it’s worth it.
***
What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends [...]
These are excuse notes from parents (including original spelling) collected by schools from all over the country.
1. My son is under a doctors care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him.
(Hala! Sige. Silya elektrika at bitay. Sabay pa! O kaya niyo yun?)
2. Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick [...]
FIRST TESTIMONY:
I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly,
‘How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?’
I turned around and walked back out and never went back
My husband didn’t say a word… he knew better.
SECOND TESTIMONY:
I was at the golf store comparing [...]
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On the first day of college, the Dean addressed the students, pointing
out some of the rules. “The female dormitory will be out-of-bounds for
all male students, and the male dormitory to the female students.
Anybody caught breaking this rule will be fined $20 the first time.”
He continued, “Anybody caught breaking this rule the second time will be
fined [...]
Pronunciation: \ˈspam\
Function: noun
Etymology: from a skit on the British television series Monty Python’s Flying Circus in which chanting of the word Spam overrides the other dialogue
Date: 1994
: unsolicited usually commercial e-mail sent to a large number of addresses
(www.m-w.com)
This blog is mainly all about forwarded emails coming from my wife, family members, friends [...]
